That Was Just Your Life

Oh Metallica, how I've missed you.
The same can be said for my blog, I've missed ranting, but I've been quite content at the moment, up until I saw George Osbournes face on Prime Ministers questions.
His face makes me so mad I want to punch a child in the face because of it. LOL JK I punch children anyway.
Which reminds me, bandwagons are, and will always be, shit!
Lately I've been running out of steam with the contents of my blog, and I think after my last blog I raged enough for several weeks worth.
Hence this very belated blog, written on a Tuesday afternoon :O

Watching the BBC news channel at the moment, and is hearing that the most deadly place in Afghanistan is being handed over from British control to American control. This is a good move, as everyone would prefer a dead American to a dead Brit (there, I said it)
The anniversary of 7/7 is today, and this is a topic that not even I'm sick enough to crack a funny on.
However, one subject I am willing to joke about, is Raoul Moat.
What a steroid addicted child beating cunt.
I'll explain this story in very simple terms

• This ginger brick shit house got into a bad ass roid rage and twatted a child
• He got arrested, and was given 18 weeks in prison
• He got out, and found out his ex bird had shacked up with the other bloke, who he thought was a police officer
• He got into another roid rage, turned green, said "you wouldn't like me when I'm angry" and shot his ex and the new boyfriend (the boyfriend then died, everyone say "awww")
• He then shot a copper, he lived (yay!)
• He then went on the run, and declared war on the police (I don't blame him, Sting is a right pretentious cunt)
• And now we're onto the present day, where countless rumours (mostly spawned by me ) have been circulating as to Moats whereabouts
  
• He's in Rothbury
• And Blyth, and Amble, and Seaton Delaval, and Birtley, and Longbenton.
• Allegedly

The Police have released an image of a man who they believe to be Moat, this was taken just outside of Rothbury:

"MOAT SMASH!!!!!!"

Another story I'm hearing on BBC news is that two gay asylum seekers have been granted asylum due to the fact that they would suffer persecution.
I think I'll just dodge this potential homophobic minefield right here.

Adverts - mainly, 5 gum
What is the point in having an advert where the only line in advertising is "How it feels to chew 5 gum" and then what follows it is a man lying on a giant pool of ball bearings whilst a heavy bassline kicks in. What does this say about the gum ? Does it have a heavy bassline ? Does it taste of balls ? or men ?
Why don't the makers of this gum just use the same line "How it feels to chew 5gum" and have the same man, in front of the camera, chew it, and go "mmm, that's quite nice"
"YOU'RE WASTING TAXPAYERS MONEY WITH YOUR NONSENSICAL ADVERTS YOU SET OF MONEY WASTING CUNTS!!!!!!!"
[/rage]
Another T.V anger point was tuning into the show "Being N- Dubz". All I understood from it is that 3 talentless cunts somehow got a record deal, and then because they were from some slums, they earned their own t.v show.
Here's an idea Channel 4, save money for this show by just having 3 graphic photos of knobs on it, because let's face it, that gives us an even better insight as to what "Being N-Dubz" is like.

End of rage, hope you enjoyed it, ish
The worlds not a shite place, but pointless T.V makes it seem that way. CAW XX